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post_secret_feed) wrote2025-09-14 12:20 amSeptember is Suicide Prevention Month
To: “frank” <frank@postsecret.com>
Subject: Re: PostSecret Help
I’d always wanted to write to you but never thought it’d be under such circumstances, ugh sorry. I’m secretly planning my death.
I realised I have depression this March. Since then I began taking some meds, and I was getting better this week. 2 nights ago, I went to a friend’s to pick up my earring I dropped the other night (he invited some friends to come over). I only had 1 drink then I got so drunk somehow. He fucked me. It hurt so much and I kept bleeding for a day. I feel extremely shame on myself since that night. I can’t even face myself, and the only thing I am thinking is to restart my life.
I couldn’t go to school today. I can’t function (a bit like my depression). I had a mental breakdown in the bathroom while taking a shower. I can’t tell my therapist (also a teacher and colleague of my mom’s from my primary school). I know it’s wrong so I went to the medical centre to find another therapist. But the registration takes a week to complete. I feel desperate. The memory keeps playing in my head.
What a fucken life!!
Regards,
-Z
~~~
From: “frank” <frank@postsecret.com>
Subject: Re: PostSecret Help
Hi Z-
This is one of the most difficult emails I have ever read. I can understand why you are in pain right now. I’m sorry that is is overwhelming right now. But I believe the fact that you took the time to share this with me indicates that part of you still wants to live.
Know this, at this exact moment, you are not alone with your heavy and suffocating feelings. I get postcards with confessions similar to yours every week, especially from young people who have suffered a traumatic experience through no fault of their own. It might not feel like it, but pain can dissipate, no matter how much it lies and tries to convince you otherwise. If your pain eventually lessened would you still want to kill yourself? Some of the secrets I receive say, I don’t want to die, I just want to pain to stop. I also get postcards from people who have found their way through the pain. They don’t say everything is great and life is painless now, but they are surprised that things can get better with time, medication, God, love, friends, music, therapy, family, a beloved pet, meditation, even endurance exercise (that’s what worked for me).
I hunted through the PostSecret archive to find two stories of people who have secrets related to the story you shared with me. Not everyone finds their way to survival and healing like these two courageous women, but it is possible. Over time there is a chance you will overcome. Give that chance time to happen, you owe it to that girl you were, and your future self. I hope that future self will mail me a postcard like one of these someday.
Maybe your depression is how you are expressing the righteous anger you must feel toward your attacker. Don’t let that rapist win. You are more important than your assailant. That is why I stopped everything I was doing to write you this message.
You wrote that your are having trouble finding a therapist. I totally believe you. Last night, I was speaking at a large university and a student told me she was waiting over a month for counseling. Another student said they were told by the campus counselor to find help off-campus. That sucks. It’s not fair, it happens to a lot of young people and it’s 100% not your fault. Here is a link to hundreds of crisis lines world-wide. Please use it and share it with others – in the future.
Here’s a link to a Harvard Study that found that nine out of ten people who attempt suicide and survive will not go on to die by suicide at a later date. This has been well-established in the suicidology literature and it’s a powerful fact to keep in mind. Nine out of ten people who felt just like you, desperate enough to kill themselves, if they were able to find their way through their worst night, got better and never made another attempt for the rest of their lives.
Can I ask you a question? Does anything still bring you joy in life? A pet, a sibling, a friend, a grandparent, a band, the beach, a book, Epic Universe, Othani in the pennant race, a forest walk, Taylor Swift’s next album?
I attached one last image to this email. It’s an picture of a young woman sending up a helium balloon of hope for a stranger who had mailed in a secret like yours. Because of one secret, over 60,000 strangers cared enough to create a “Please Don’t Jump” facebook page proving people do care and there is hope, even if your depression has convinced you otherwise – don’t believe it, depression and anxiety are liars.
A friend of mine – Kevin Hines – tried to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge to end his life. He is one of the ten or so people, from the thousands who have jumped off that bridge and died, to have survived. He travels the country sharing his inspiring story. It’s like his life was spared so that he can reveal the secret last thought of people who attempt suicide. He has shared his story with millions of people around the world. This is what he says, As soon as I let go of the cables and began to fall from the bridge, I realized I was making a mistake.
Be well,
-Frank
[After I shared the message above on facebook, I invited the PostSecret Community to, “share something you would have never experienced if you had completed suicide”. There were hundreds of heartfelt stories. Here are a handful. . . ]
• Today my son received a beam initiative scholarship and a bassoon lesson with Lecolion Washington (LW plays the basson in The Lion King). I am so glad I decided to walk through the tunnel. There is a light at the end and it’s beautiful.
• If I had killed myself almost 4 years ago, I would have never accepted myself as LGBT; I wouldn’t be as close with my parents; and I would have devastated my dog who adores me. Without me he would have probably been passed from owner to owner, not living the life of adventure I’ve given him.
• I wouldn’t have experienced finding the right mix of medication to help me understand how my life should be!
• The love of this good hearted man. Not too mention so many other things, like my current job where I get to help others.
• Camping with my sister and our kids. Waking up at 6am and watching the sun rise over the mist on the lake. I would have missed this and so much more.
• I would’ve missed the chance to be with someone who sends me messages like this.
• I never would have been able to help my sister get the help she needed if I gave up 2 years ago. My life isn’t perfect, but I am so thankful for how far I’ve come.
• I mean, come on, we’ve all got to vote in 2020! And I agree, there’s always something good to look forward to… even if you don’t know what it is, yet!
• I would’ve been gone before she arrived. Shes worth staying for.
• Becoming a midwife and being the one to witness and welcome hundreds of new lives into the world.
• In May of 2009 after my second combat tour I was found hanging from a tree branch. This photo was a month ago. Not a day goes by that I’m not happy, I know what could have been. Nothing, and I repeat nothing, is worth not being there for. I cherish every moment now because I know I chose to forfeit everyone of these and that I don’t deserve them. But I get them, and I will love every one of them.
• I never would have gotten into medical school and had the honor of putting on this white coat and helping others. I never attempted but thought about it every day for a very long time. Took me until well into my adulthood to realize that there are downs, and then eventually ups again and if you check out early, you never get to see what your ups may have been.
• I’ve still got too many people to piss off yet.
• This guy. Oh! And my husband.
• the northern lights
• Getting to ride again.
• Goodness . . . I’m sitting at the table trying not to sob as I read this, because I don’t want to have to explain it to the family . . . At 16 I contemplated it. The only thing that stopped me was I didn’t want my Mom to find me. If I would have went through with it, I wouldn’t have met the group of friends who got me started in allowing myself to show the goofy side only when I was with them, then at 30+ I wouldn’t have met the amazing people on f.b. who allowed me to be the silly, goofy, weird me, that most people in real life look at me funny when they see it because I’m always so serious. Thanks #PostSecret for making me emotional, but also challenging me to think of what I would have missed out on.
• Just because you haven’t found your reason to live yet, it doesn’t mean you never will.
The post September is Suicide Prevention Month appeared first on PostSecret.
post_secret_feed) wrote2025-09-14 12:05 amOff The Table
Hi Frank –
I sent you this secret some time later in my college days. Then I sent you an update after a few years later as well – which is when I think my secret debuted on Sunday Secrets. I didn’t screenshot or save it. If you have a copy of that, that would be cool.
I wish I could say that the journey was as linear as youthful self once thought and that everything was rainbows and butterflies these days. Mental health seems to be more of journey than a destination. I did find a hella good therapist about four years ago who helped me realize that I was neurodivergent. What a difference that made on my perspective. We are slogging through some trauma work. The commitment to following through on this secret did take suicide off the table. The struggles have been many since then and the journey hasn’t been perfect. However, I’m still here and resilience has won the day. Thanks for giving people a place to launch things into the universe.
The post Off The Table appeared first on PostSecret.
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post_secret_feed) wrote2025-09-06 05:14 pmSeptember is Suicide Prevention Month
—email—
Dear Frank,
I was the one who sent this in September of 2007. It was September of my freshman year in high school and I had just gotten out of a deep depression. On April 25th, 2007, I had written the note, thinking that life would never get better than my depressed, 14-year old existence. But for whatever wonderful reason, I kept going. Oddly enough, I didn’t get rid of the suicide note. I’m not sure what was stopping me.
I had wanted to send in a secret since I discovered Postsecret in 7th grade in the midst of my first bout of depression. I instantly fell in love with it. I try realized that other people were in just as much pain as I was. When I started to feel better, I realize I needed to get rid of the note. I thought that ripping it up and sending it to Postsecret was the best way to do it.
I am now almost 23 and studying to be a social worker. Right now, I want to do mental health advocacy. I want people to be able to access treatment and realize they’re not alone.
But I’ve also been struggling. This year, my depression came back with a vengeance, along with an eating disorder. Monday night, I I was exhausted and sick from days of restricting. I was so frustrated with the fact that I couldn’t seem to get better. I lied in my bed and begged God to take away my pain. I was so afraid of my own pain, I made my housemate keep my meds in her room so I wouldn’t have access to them in the middle of the night.
Tuesday morning, I barely rolled out of bed. I was procrastinating on getting ready for class, and I realized I hadn’t checked Postsecret this week. I scrolled through the Sunday secrets, past the pictures of the Smithsonian exhibit (which I fully intend to visit), then I saw mine. I immediately recognized it. I couldn’t believe it. I thought that since it wasn’t posted 8 years ago, it would never be posted. I was so glad that I was an inspirational suicide story. It was like getting a note from my ninth grade self reassuring me that it was going to be okay.
Ironically, I’ve been showing the post to everyone. My mom told me she was so glad she never had to read it. One of my housemates hugged me and said she was getting goosebumps. My pastor said he couldn’t imagine a world without me and was also glad I had introduced him to Postsecret. My therapist was amazed that you had kept it for that long and that it must have really impacted you. She pointed out that it was clearly written by a child (with the handwriting and the purple gel pen), and that if I could impact a stranger with my story at the age of 14, imagine how I could use my story now.
Thank you so much for Postsecret. For the approximately nine years I have followed it, it has amused me, changed my perception of others, and made me realize I’m not alone. I’m am so glad that Postsecret was a way for me to reach and inspire others, even 8 years later.
Sincerely,
Claire
Aspiring social worker and life-changer
—email—
Dear Claire,
Thank you for sharing your honest story and secret. It is gratifying to see the people PostSecret touches, in the same way you will never fully appreciate all the strangers you have inspired – and will inspire.
-Frank
—email—
Dear Frank,
It has been many years, since my secret was featured on PostSecret, but I have never forgotten about it. It was a hugely transformative moment in my life. I recently decided to share the story on a podcast. Here’s the link. After my story was shared on the podcast, I got a tattoo to remind me of this whole story, and to symbolize my resilience throughout all of this. I am so grateful that I had my opportunity to share my secret with the world. I am also thankful that I am in a place where it is not a secret anymore. Thank you for providing the space to share.
The post September is Suicide Prevention Month appeared first on PostSecret.
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dw_maintenance2025-08-31 07:37 pmCode deploy happening shortly
Per the dw_news post regarding the MS/TN blocks, we are doing a small code push shortly in order to get the code live. As per usual, please let us know if you see anything wonky.
There is some code cleanup we've been doing that is going out with this push but I don't think there is any new/reworked functionality, so it should be pretty invisible if all goes well.
Mississippi site block, plus a small restriction on Tennessee new accounts
A reminder to everyone that starting tomorrow, we are being forced to block access to any IP address that geolocates to the state of Mississippi for legal reasons while we and Netchoice continue fighting the law in court. People whose IP addresses geolocate to Mississippi will only be able to access a page that explains the issue and lets them know that we'll be back to offer them service as soon as the legal risk to us is less existential.
The block page will include the apology but I'll repeat it here: we don't do geolocation ourselves, so we're limited to the geolocation ability of our network provider. Our anti-spam geolocation blocks have shown us that their geolocation database has a number of mistakes in it. If one of your friends who doesn't live in Mississippi gets the block message, there is nothing we can do on our end to adjust the block, because we don't control it. The only way to fix a mistaken block is to change your IP address to one that doesn't register as being in Mississippi, either by disconnecting your internet connection and reconnecting it (if you don't have a static IP address) or using a VPN.
In related news, the judge in our challenge to Tennessee's social media age verification, parental consent, and parental surveillance law (which we are also part of the fight against!) ruled last month that we had not met the threshold for a temporary injunction preventing the state from enforcing the law while the court case proceeds.
The Tennesee law is less onerous than the Mississippi law and the fines for violating it are slightly less ruinous (slightly), but it's still a risk to us. While the fight goes on, we've decided to prevent any new account signups from anyone under 18 in Tennessee to protect ourselves against risk. We do not need to block access from the whole state: this only applies to new account creation.
Because we don't do any geolocation on our users and our network provider's geolocation services only apply to blocking access to the site entirely, the way we're implementing this is a new mandatory question on the account creation form asking if you live in Tennessee. If you do, you'll be unable to register an account if you're under 18, not just the under 13 restriction mandated by COPPA. Like the restrictions on the state of Mississippi, we absolutely hate having to do this, we're sorry, and we hope we'll be able to undo it as soon as possible.
Finally, I'd like to thank every one of you who's commented with a message of support for this fight or who's bought paid time to help keep us running. The fact we're entirely user-supported and you all genuinely understand why this fight is so important for everyone is a huge part of why we can continue to do this work. I've also sent a lot of your comments to the lawyers who are fighting the actual battles in court, and they find your wholehearted support just as encouraging and motivating as I do. Thank you all once again for being the best users any social media site could ever hope for. You make me proud and even more determined to yell at state attorneys general on your behalf.